The wonder that's keeping the stars apart

12 days. Twelve days I havebeen in Morocco today. I felt the urge today to count the number of days I have been in this country. Just enough time to start to feel a pang of longing for loved ones at home but also to grow comforted on my walk home, knowing I was returning to my new Moroccan home. This place full of kind generous people has already lived up to the all encompassing term, "home". I have a family who already has welcomed me as one of their own; I am blessed with dinners to fill my stomach each night, a room to share with a bed piled with blankets, and a feeling of contentment to feed my soul. I am reminded though that things are different here; I am forced to live without, to go outside of my comfort zone, to live in a very different way than I am used to. And for this I am thankful. I came to Morocco knowing I would not have a normal or easy experience. Living in a less developed country, learning a new and difficult language, becoming familiar with a culture and religion that sees life and the world differently than anything I have been exposed to before. I am ready for this.

It is time for me to distance myself from everything I know and have always known. To be away from those I love and sometimes depend on. Time to feel uneasy, scared, uncomfortable, and maybe even sad. But I know that these feelings, moments when I want to burst into tears, will not come without great rewards. In the end I will have learned a beautiful and meaningful language. I will have lived within a culture completely different from my own and learned from it, learned things I can share with others. I will understand better a religion that I and much of the world know little about. I will have formed strong, lasting relationships with Moroccans and others. I will have taken tests and written papers. But most importantly I will have developed a "Me" outside of the me I know now. Across the Atlantic with nothing but a suitcase all I have is myself to depend on. So the challenge will be to discover a "me" that is truly without a doubt nothing but ME. I will have a greater vision of who I am, what I stand for, my beliefs, my quirks, my talents, my likes and dislikes, and my life passion. With this I will be able to work toward the best me I can be.

I believe in all of my being that this will come from my experience in Morocco, and so it will be, Insha'Allah!

...here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

- ee cummings

Layla Saida friends

More pictures and news on how my first week of classes is going to come!